Don't feed the birds

[Old_Bob]

Further to the thread about the Blackbird at Staplehurst I have heard that it has been seen flapping about trying to get it's overweight body off the ground.
It has been mistaken for a Crow and has had to be taken to a bird psychologist for councelling. A local ornithologist has been quoted as saying " the poor thing is at the point of a mental as well as physical collapse". He went on to say " It is the only bird we have seen with a cholesterol level of 7, we have been concerned that it is at risk from the local cats, but luckily, cats being fussy eaters they don't like greasy food"



The Landlord of the local pub where this phsyco overweight serial brekkie mugger lurks is deeply concerned about the safety of his customers, particularly as the creature has'nt emptied it's bowels for days.

So when visiting Staplehurst be afraid, very afraid, and beware of low flying overweight birds cos when they crap, it might be on you

[Gypsy]

Saw a few fat low flyin birds about today mate ,this habit must be spreading ,have to cut out the fried bread with brekky n try wholemeal be healthier for the little beggars ,,,,.
Tho that bird yesterday hopped over to me n sort of winked ,as it offered up a worm for a trade but aint the same as black pudding .So i winked back n he scarpered

[Framie]

Are you sure it's not Gypsy's version of a reasonably priced Ortolan Bunting??

YouTube - Clarkson eats an Ortolan bunting

[Janie]

i feel sick now afta watchin that!!

[Troy]

Originally Posted by Gypsy

Tho that bird yesterday hopped over to me n sort of winked

It was nice to you then.
With me it was "give me your fried bread or I'll bite your fecking arm off"

...and it's 'though'.Don't you bloody start

[Old_Bob]

A Corsican delicacy is Pate de Merle --- Blackbird pate, usually served with a fair sized piece of breast in the pate. Quite interesting as a starter before the main dish of Wild Boar. Mmmmmmm Wild Boar sausages and chips, now I am feeling hungry

[Gypsy]

Blackbird pate nuh i like em singing to much
i myself favour widgeon pie ,or pheasant well hung of course tho whats that got to do with it i dont know
A nice quail or 2 wouldnt go amiss tho ,so leave me blackbird alone

[Troy]

Originally Posted by Old_Bob

usually served with a fair sized piece of breast in the pate.

Sounds like my kind of meal.I usually like mine covered in whipped cream but if blackbird pate is all that's available........I'm game

[Troy]

Originally Posted by Gypsy

,or pheasant well hung of course

I'll stick to the female pheasants ....

OK.I'll stop now

[Gypsy]

Whipped cream thats for afters ,oh i see what ya mean mate