English Lessons

[HogHog]

Dearest Bretheren of Region 2,

It has been drawn to my attention, that thou know not how to communicate using the English of her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.

Let it be known amongst ye all that I shall be holding lessons for all the commoners with a view to imparting my knowledge of Her Majestys English.

This will cost thou nought but 4 imperial pints of Magners Original Irish Cider per student.

I, as Lecturer on this course, and having consumed only 7 of these pints this very evening, look forward to welcoming you to your studies, and wish you every success (although if you fail a repetition of this course will be required).

Those wishing to sign up are requested to send a copy of the application form - in triplicate - and with Magners tins attached - to "I-Cannae-speak-properly-yet-but-will-once-HogHog-teaches-me", c/o HDRCGB, etc. etc. etc.

Those Region 2 members who do not wish to complete this course are requested to at least make an attempt at English

[Stuarty]

Originally Posted by HogHog

Dearest Bretheren of Region 2,

It has been drawn to my attention, that thou know not how to communicate using the English of her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.

Let it be known amongst ye all that I shall be holding lessons for all the commoners with a view to imparting my knowledge of Her Majestys English.

This will cost thou nought but 4 imperial pints of Magners Original Irish Cider per student.

I, as Lecturer on this course, and having consumed only 7 of these pints this very evening, look forward to welcoming you to your studies, and wish you every success (although if you fail a repetition of this course will be required).

Those wishing to sign up are requested to send a copy of the application form - in triplicate - and with Magners tins attached - to "I-Cannae-speak-properly-yet-but-will-once-HogHog-teaches-me", c/o HDRCGB, etc. etc. etc.

Those Region 2 members who do not wish to complete this course are requested to at least make an attempt at English

Gaunbileyerheid!!

[Mrs T]

OMG, didn't understand a fecking word of Hoghog's but i did understand Stuarty

[HogHog]

Originally Posted by Stuarty

Gaunbileyerheid!!

Ah - I see - an attempt to confuse me.

Well I'm afraid it failed miserably.

"Gaunbileyerheid" - Translates literally to "HogHog though great leader - impart - more of your wisdom to me".

Oh you are a naughty "Stuarty".

I'll have to send you home with a hundred lines - no they won't be Coke Lines.

[Gogsy]

awa' 'n blaw up yer Grannies Shuigh !!!!
or "heech neech,broon keech".

[Stuarty]

Originally Posted by HogHog

................. I'll have to send you home with a hundred lines - no they won't be Coke Lines.

that Coke is bad for yer teeth

[HogHog]

Originally Posted by Gogsy

awa' 'n blaw up yer Grannies Shuigh !!!!

Dear fellow - haven't the foggiest idea about which you type.

I had rather thought that this HDRCGB may be a jolly good wheez, but guess I'd better go back amongst the horned ruminant mammals of the genus Ovis in the family Bovidae, and practice physical sexual contact between individuals that involves the genitalia of at least one person, unlike my friend who is a "Sheepshagger"

[HogHog]

Originally Posted by Stuarty

that Coke is bad for yer teeth

Wot teeth - I thought u were a biker - no teeth an loads of Tats an all that.?

[Stuarty]

Originally Posted by HogHog

Wot teeth - I thought u were a biker - no teeth an loads of Tats an all that.?

Naw, nae tats an few teeth

And if yon Ayrshire boys get in here wae the lingo yae might as well shut the shoap coz naebidy unnerstans a word fae thame.......except Mrs T

[HogHog]

Originally Posted by Stuarty

Naw, nae tats an few teeth

And if yon Ayrshire boys get in here wae the lingo yae might as well shut the shoap coz naebidy unnerstans a word fae thame.......except Mrs T

Eye can onessly say I havna fukin clu wot yuz guys typ on heer but at leest it keepz youz happee.

May I take this opportunity to inform you of my imminent departure this very evening from this Forum.

May God look upon you well and perhaps we can re-convene in the morning.

Off Veeder Zein (or something like that)